Monday, November 3, 2014

Birds of a feather or facsimiles thereof


Aviary Wonders Inc.

 Spring Catalog and Instruction Manual
Renewing the World’s Bird Supply Since 2031
By Kate Samworth

Imagine a near future that did not include our feathered friends.

What To Do?

For all us Do-It-Yourselfers, you’d turn to the Aviary Wonders Inc. Catalog and Instruction Manual and let your fingers to do the walking (oh, hang on that’s Yellow Pages and for those who don’t know what yellow pages are and wonder why your fingers would have to walk - just Google it, sigh…).

This catalogue offers only the highest quality bird assemblages from basic body types, feet, wings, tails and collars all made with the highest quality materials and precision.  Feather colours are vibrantly captured using 100% Indian silk. Functional , hand-crafted beaks come in many patterns that range far from reality.  Collars, crests and wattle and combs are resplendent and varied. Browsing through this catalogue is thrilling as one ponders the possible combinations and permutations.

But when it comes to selecting and putting your bird together it gets more involved – way more involved.  There's nothing slap-dash about it.

*1st, body type: Do you want a swimmer, wader, percher or bird of prey?
*2nd, beaks: What will your bird eat?  Insects? Meat? Plants? Fish? This is crucial!
*3rd, tails:  Used for braking, balancing, steering and display.
*4th, legs and feet:  Selected based on body type, habitat and lifestyle.
*5th, wings:  Depends on flight patterns and specific needs for maneuverability and quick get-a-ways.

There is so much to consider. All selections have vital consequences for the end result for your feathered friend.  Improbable portions could end in disaster. Therefore, do not put paddling feet on a bird of prey with finch wings and a rooster tail.

Then you have to actually put the dang thing together - challenging even the most apt IKEA furniture assembler, if you ask me.  By the time you begin putting parts together, you wonder if it’s really worth all the effort. Maybe we should just get down to saving the birds we still have on this earth and enjoy these perfectly constructed, adapted creatures that we often take for granted.
 

A very clever book that would work well with elementary and middle grades.  Great tie-ins with science, environmental education, activism and art.

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